Wednesday, February 15, 2012

WHY ME?!?!?!?!?!?!?

I am like giant cosmic magnet for awkward/uncomfortable situations. And you know what? I really only have myself to blame. I get myself into these unfortunate predicaments by opening my good for next to nothing mouth. Well, that's not entirely true, it might also have something to do with my "hearing loss", or whatever. Due to "prolonged and excessive" use of headphones through out my life, I may have some "hearing loss" which has led to countless "misunderstandings". For example, I have not thrice, but TWICE mistook someone saying "take the hand of the person next to you" for "take the head of the person next to you". Both times, while my hands were extended, reaching toward my neighbor's (always a stranger, mind you) head, I was able to quickly realize my bad, and play it off by quickly running my hands through my hair and throwing a quick hand pretending to be a gun and shootin' um with a winky face (a run-on sentence, I know. But totes worth it).

Rough artist rendition. Thank you www.artwanted.com/sketchpad for your handy online tool!

Anywhose, today I opened my mouth and awkwardness ensued. I got a Starbucks card from a special Valentine, AKA my mom, so I started my morning off at the Bucks (trying to get this to catch, feel free to join in). It was pretty busy, full of mostly tourists. So, I ordered my drink and hovered near the bar waiting for my drink to be ready. When, to my left I hear and man ask, "What was that?"

Now I know for a fact I had been singing "My Baby" by Lil' Romeo, in my head, and I was like 60% sure I hadn't sang anything out loud. My mind was racing so I just said the last thing I remembered saying outloud, "Tall decaf soy latte" I said to him.

"I don't think so." was his reply

Now I had no idea what kind mind game this guy was playing, cause I was PRETTY sure that's what I ordered, so I tried to remember if I had said anything else. "I maybe coughed a little" I said meekly.

As soon as I started to form the l for little, I saw the tell-tale white head phones, and realized he was talking to someone on his iPhone. But we've all been there right? No big deal! He didn't even notice I was having a conversation with him. The only people who might have noticed were the 50 some odd people waiting for the drinks. It really was no big deal, but I just couldn't find a way to be normal after such an event. So when the barista called out a drink, I looked about wildly and headed toward the counter, looking like a child raised by wild dogs who was being reintegrated into society. Quickly, I realized the drink wasn't mine. It was clearly some kind of iced, caramel thing.

"Oh, I ordered a hot drink. I don't think they would get it wrong." I said this part quietly, to myself, but the next part was louder "Must not be my drink". I looked at the gal next to me and slightly shrugged. She smiled sweetly. I spent the remaining time, waiting in the corner for my tall decaf soy latte.

Anyway I guess I'll just leave you with 2001 music video "My Baby" by Master P's son Lil Romeo


3 comments:

  1. The other day I heard someone refer to Chipotle as "Chipotes" - similar to your 'Bucks. I think they should both catch on.

    I remember listening to Lil Romeo's "Hush Little Lady" on the Robyn B. Thuggin mix!

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  2. "So when the barista called out a drink, I looked about wildly and headed toward the counter, looking like a child raised by wild dogs who was being reintegrated into society." hahahahaha. this made me lolz. i can totally picture it. the feral bunny does this, too.

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  3. I too, swim in awkward. Only it could also be called inappropriate in my case.

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