Mystery Solved!

A few days ago it finally donned on me why I have a tinsies bitty bitty problem making friends my own age. I can almost hear those of you who know me well shouting: "You don't know what to do with your hands and face while carrying on a conversation!" "You remember a creepy amount of information about people TOO SOON in your relationship" "YOU DON'T LIKE TO BRUSH YOUR TEETH!". To which I say: rude, rude, rude. No, the real answer is: I have the maturate sensibility of a woman 40 to 50 years my senior. Please, do not misunderstand. I can eventually makes friends with my peers, but it takes a some quality, quantity time.

After moving, I racked my brain thinking of ways to make friends. I seemed to vaguely recall, that during parties there are usually two people who have large circles of people form around them. One is the guy or gal who has intricate choreographed dances, showcasing various forms of dance, to every song that's played (usually me). The other being the person who tell stories starting with "one day, at daily Mass...". And to be honest, I'm not entirely sure that's how good party stories start... I'm usually dancing so hard I get severely dehydrated and pass out 45 minutes in. J sorta K about that jazz, but I really thought church would be a good place to meet young adults. I mean, what 20 something doesn't LOVE a routine which involves getting up and out of the house by 6:30 each morning?!?!? The answer is, most 20 somethings don't like that... Yep, most. I can't complain though. This is where I met Betty, my retiree friend, whom I speak about briefly here.

After deciding daily Mass was a bit of a bust, I mean friend-wise, and I mean friends-outside-of-Jesus-and-Betty-wise, I thought I should be doing something a little more active! Enter canoeing. The Kihei Canoe club has visitor days, when for a small donation (or if you just blink profusely and clear your throat when asked for a donation, they don't usually push the issue) you can spend a couple hours canoeing around the ocean on traditional Hawaiian outrigger canoes.

Look at the gal in blue, just loving life

Sadly, I was again, the youngest person there by at least 30 years. And as it so happens (that's a common saying, right?), this is something young people generally know about the sport of canoeing. Several hours after I came home after one canoe outing, once the IC (idiot children, aka my roommates) woke up, I told them about how I was the youngest one out there. The boy IC said "Right? In da mahning, dair ah some ripped uncles outdair." Translation: I know. In the morning it seems to be, only strong older men out there (I'm slightly exaggerating his pigeon, for effect).

So, early activities were out. Then one day, while getting my 14 hours of internetting on, I came across a website for Kalama Heights Community Center. And guess what class they offer... HULA!!! I thought I had died and gone to heaven. And get this, the class was at 4pm, so I thought there might be more young people. My mind was made up, I was DEFINITELY gonna check that out the following Saturday. That Friday I went back to the website to get the address. You know, so I could do a dry run to time how long it takes me to get there, so I can get there 20 minutes AKA uncomfortably early. It was then that I realized, it's not Kalama Heights Community Center, it's Kalama Heights SENIOR center, and classes were only offered for the 55 and over crowd. Agism at it's worst, I think. So, I didn't go, but I kind of wish I had. I bet I could have made up a story about how it was all a misunderstanding, or how I suffered from Benjamin Button Syndrome. Or perhaps I could have some how ended up teaching the class!! I think I've watched enough YouTube to make that work. Maybe I'll try again next week.

An age-progressed photo of how I might look in 20 years. Can't say I'm crazy about it. It would appear I become a vampire in the future. Notice the red blood stains down the edges of my mouth. But I do kinda look like Steve, which is lovely.

Sincerely,
Kathryn